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Something Had to Go

I haven't posted in awhile. I spent all this time and energy to get the website up. I am not a tech person, so I tried to do my own website first and kept getting frustrated, so then I switched over to Wix, but you still have to customize everything to what you want. I was also trying to market my children's book. I was also starting to work on a second children's book. I would spend HOURS on the computer while the kids were watching a movie and after I put them to bed. I wanted to know what the best way was, what was everyone's secret, how to do x, y, and z. At the end of the day I just felt tired.


I was all excited to start this blog. I had a social media plan of attack. However, I was also trying to renovate my kitchen, start a second children's book AND then Corona hit. So, I found myself working from home (my day job), and teaching 3 children school and I was washing dishes in the sink in my garage, because my entire kitchen had been gutted and guess what? Cabinets and countertops were on back order due to COVID 19. To say it was a stressful time is an understatement. Something had to go, so it was the blog. All the carefully laid out, well poured over plans went out the window just like that. I was now in survival mode.


I stopped reading books which I love to do. My brain was overloaded and needed a break. I stopped going to church which I also love. For three weeks the kids and myself did not leave the house. Hubby was considered essential so he never got any time off. Me, three smallish, energetic kids in a house with no kitchen. I did what any normal person would do. I kicked them outside. From March when the pandemic struck to about the middle of May, they were outside for three to four hours a day. I was in my rocking chair while they played in the front yard or we would swim in the pool. Once it got too hot to play outside, we then rotated from the pool to the beach (We live in Florida, so we bought an annual pass to our local beach/park).


In the beginning, I was so thankful for this break. I know it is a pandemic and it is very serious, but it brought my entire life to a halt. I started to see clearly what was important to me and what was not. Who cares if I have money if I can't go anywhere to spend it. Who cared if I had money saved for a kitchen if I couldn't get anyone to do the job. Who cares about the trivial things when you're worried about your parents who are getting up there in years and could be susceptible to this latest disease.


Six months into this pandemic, my kitchen has been finished and I am still switching between the pool and the beach. My life consists of running as many errands as possible without the kids and with a mask on. We are able to enjoy our days because we are free to explore. We are not on a time crunched schedule. As the school year starts to get closer, I am getting all tense and starting to revert back to trying to get into a schedule, but why? Because that's all I have ever known. I also know that I will spend time making lists and schedules that I only follow for a week or two, then throw them out, so really what's the point?


I don't like being told what to do or where to go all the time. Before the pandemic, my husband and I had already decided to homeschool, for many reasons, but mainly because I couldn't be three places at once. All the kids were on different schedules that overlapped and it was exhausting to try to keep up. So, I am using this year 2020 to take a deep breath and throw away my schedules and my desires to attempt a schedule. We are reverting back to a simple life.


So many things are still closed, so most of our field trips will be outside visiting parks. At first, I thought that will get old really fast, but then I looked at all the parks around us. We have A LOT of parks. I have lived in Florida my entire life and haven't even seen half of what there is to offer. So, now is my time to go exploring. As I am planning/trying not to plan school, I am looking forward to learning right beside my children, seeing things that I haven't had time for or never cared to do before.


I understand if you are working or if your kids are going back to a physical school it is hard to throw out the schedule. You have to do what works best for you. But if you can, put a little grace in your schedule. Take some time to go for a walk, or to let your kids just sit on the concrete and watch the ants work. It is okay to stop everything for a minute and just breathe and be thankful that you are alive and healthy.


I love to write, but I lost my passion when I tried to put it on a schedule or when I told myself I had to write. I know there are SO many bloggers out there that make a very successful living off their blog because they have invested time, effort, energy and a have a scheduled work day, but that's not me. I am not a sales person. I just want to share my story to encourage someone else going through the same thing. I will start writing again and will definitely do a kitchen post and share pics.


Blessings,


Maria


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